Tennessean tries kissing it to make it all better

This morning’s Tennessean  editorial  attempted to save Commissioner Kevin “IVFO” Huffman’s job by declaring him incompetent (as opposed to criminal) as it relates to the TCAP debacle.  Faint praise indeed.  But the way the editorial geniuses at the Tennessean went about it was obsequious bordering on the pathetic.  It is abundantly clear the folks at the Tennessean are in desperate need of help.  And, as always, we here at RTP are more than glad to offer our unsolicited and frequently unappreciated advice.  Here goes:

"Will kiss butt for editorial"

“Will kiss butt for editorial”

Step #1:  Slowly and carefully remove your lips from Gov. Haslam’s derrier.  Done?  Proceed to

Step #2:  Try to get the most basic facts correct.

Step #3;  Tell Ingram and Seigenthaler to lay off the cocktails when they dictate editorials.

The merriment started from the headline of the editorial itself:

“TCAP delay probably was an error, not a plot.”

“Probably”?  Now there’s a a big, fat hairy qualifier if we’ve ever seen one (and the contributors at RTP have seen plenty in our time).  Why, the editors are so sure of their belief in Huffman’s innocence (or incompetence) that they use weasel-words to get around the fact that they don’t know the facts of the case (as we shall soon illustrate).

But “probably” is more than sufficient for the Tennessean to declare that an investigation is not necessary.  Ya know, Nixon wasn’t well-liked, was a poor communicator and when Watergate was first revealed it was called  “probably” a third-rate burglary.  But the ever-thorough RTP team checked their Lexis Nexus archives account and could not find a single Tennessean editorial saying “but  a formal investigation [of Watergate] is another matter.”

"I am not a plotter"

“I am not a plotter”

Huffman as Nixon?  Not a fair comparison.  Tricky Dick was much more popular in Tennessee than Kevin.

Yeah, you don’t want those nasty old facts coming out and blowing the whole Common Core agenda to smithereens, now would you?  And getting the facts right seems to be a recurring problem for the editors at the Tennessean.  Just a couple of weeks ago, you Frank Daniels The Third wrote and editorial that said the governor was in process of deciding the replacement for a retiring state Supreme Court justice.  Of course, your own paper had already announced weeks before Frank the III’s column the identity of the replacement selected by the governor, along with a nice color photo.

And now for the latest act of journalistic bumbling.  The editorial went on to declare:

“Rep. Billy Spivey of Lewisburg … called for Huffman’s resignation.”

Uh, no, he didn’t.  To our knowledge Rep. Spivey has never called for Huffman’s resignation.  Maybe you were thinking of Rep. Rick Womick, who did.  But hey, your careless mistake was understandable.  After all, most conservatives all look alike to you guys.  Plus you never see them at your club or hanging around the stacks and sipping their latte’s at Book Man Book Woman.

Here’s some breaking news for the Tennessean (not that they would recognize breaking news if it hit them squarely in the ass kisser).  What Huffman did was likely illegal, certainly incompetent and most definitely a big problem for students, teachers, parents and school administrators all across the state.  If the governor, his paid-under-the-table lobbyist Tom Ingram and Huffman think the Tennessean’s pathetic little editorial is going to make the boo-boo all better, think again.

Your reading public so looks forward to your next “probable” opinion.

 

 

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